My Story Of Euan

 I'm finally" home sweet home" and ready to begin my journey into motherhood with Euan. I'm full of emotions and I wrote this half awake this morning to get some of them out on paper. Thank you for all your support and kind words over the last 9 months. Euan is beautiful and I'm super duper blessed! Love, Christy xoxo

Like many amazing woman before me I became a mother on Feb 21, 2012 at 11:45am to Euan Ross Gillespie he weighed 7.3lbs an absolute miracle!

Thank you everyone for your support and love throughout my pregnacy. It's been overwhelming and I truly feel blessed to have met you all along the way somewhere and to still have you in my life. Here is my story for the ones who care to read...  

 My first water broke Feb 19 at 11:30pm (Did you know there were two/front and back or so they call it in the UK) Never have I read or heard this anywhere. 

I was standing in front of the bedroom mirror about to put oil on my belly while Steve brushed his teeth, I called Steve into the room to let him see how huge my belly was on this particular evening. I was about to change into my P.J's when It happened ( my water broke) all over the hardwood flooring.. Steve looked at me shocked and I started laughing embarrassed and said- well it's not wee! And then laughed more and said I think we are about to become parents to a baby boy! 

Since I had requested a home birth only a few weeks before I wasn't entirely sure what to do next. I called my parents (as you do) to share the news and jumped into the shower to shave my legs! Styled my hair and prepared for birth in the downstairs living room. Steve went to sleep (smart guy) I was too excited - like the feeling you get the night before you go on vacation. I had waited 36 years for this and watched so many of my beautiful friends go through this but never in my dreams did I really know how it would feel. I stayed up all night and with very faint contractions. When Steve woke up at six I went to bed until 11:30, he brought me up sausage and eggs. We relaxed a little and decided to have "our last without baby meal" and early birthday lunch for him at Brown's.

 At this point I was whole heartly on board with my home birth plan and excited! I was breathing through the tiny bit of discomfort I was feeling from the contractions and honestly thought I would be one of those lucky people you hear about that have an easy labour! At 4pm one of our midwives called and asked how I was feeling. I told her ""great" that we were about to take Connor to swimming lessons and make supper. She informed me that because I my waters had broke almost 24hours before and I was at a risk for infection it was policy. I was to go to the hospital to have the babies heart rate monitored and they could potentially keep me in if they thought there was potential risk. I didn't understand anything she was saying to me all I heard was HOSPITAL and thought but I'm having my baby at home why aren't you coming to me?! I was broken hearted and when I got of the phone I burst into tears and lost all confidence that I'd been building for 8 months. I called our private midwife that I'd had a few sessions with but hadn't booked for the birth. She was very upset with the NHS and said I did not have to go to the hospital and she would call the midwife supervisor on duty. In the end because there is no point in rehashing all the drama that occured from 4-7:30 I spoke to a friend who gave me some amazing advise. It went something like this- " at the end of the day you will have a beautiful baby and it won't matter how he came into this world "  I ended up going to St. Michaels and having the fetal heart rate checked and an exam to tell me I wasn't dilated not one little bit!!! If I hadn't dilated at all or started "Active Labour" it would be strongly advised that I not only have a hospital birth but that I be induced the morning following but that it was my decision to make and my risk to take.... I went home stubborn and broken. (I felt like the system had failed me) I had been listening to this stupid hypnobirthing "magic" for 8 months and all for what to have my entire birthing plan go out the window. (this happens a lot)- who knew! I hunkered down and spent the longest 7 hours of my life in what I thought was active labour. In the shower the bath the birthing ball, the basement. Rolling around like a crazy lady in signifigant pain. The midwife finally came out!! when my contractions were 2 minutes apart and after a very invasive check I was advised that there was distress and I should go to the hospital but again, it was my decision!!! Why did they bother promoting this home birth?! I was so confused, in pain and broken. I packed up my things and went to the hospital and at this point begged for anything they could give me to relieve some of the pain. (all of it) I was not a happy camper and looking back was completely rude to anyone in my path. I bawled just before getting an epi and told everyone to give me a minute please this was my body and I needed to gain back some control. CRAZY LADY! 

I held on to Steve's hands tight as she listed the many issues side effect that could occur by taking an epidural- she kept saying in a very stern english accent I need you to understand and agree to all of this! I just kept saying yes, yes, yes! Once I was given an epidural it was all pretty much a vacation for me.  I had no idea what I was feeling anymore just exhausted and reliant on everyone around me to birth this baby. Euan was in distress. I pushed his head a wee bit and was told they would have to perform a small Episiotomy as his heart rate was way too high. At this point they called in a doctor- the only one I'd seen throughout my entire pregnancy in the UK. I pushed a few more times very hard (who knows mostly gritted my teeth but they said it was good!) and out came Euan right to my chest and we found out the cord was wrapped around his neck and no amount of pushing would have helped. It was the craziest thing but probably the same story for many of you. We cried, Steve told me how proud he was of me, and we stared at the marvel of birth. I told them I wanted to give birth to my placenta naturally?? Nope not an option and the shot they gave me to help the placenta come out caused me to have massive vomiting!  I'm not sure how my husband can even look at me the same anymore but he seems to still fancy me?! Euan and I are home now and getting on with the next task.. breast feeding we are all very tired but doing well. I know everyone will understand if I disappear for a while but have never been one to do so for too long! xoxoxo

Euan: Narrative: is of Scottish and Gaelic origin, and the meaning of Euan is "born ofyew; youth". From Eoghan. Also means "little swift one" in Irish Gaelic. The ancient, original form of this name refers to the yew tree. The name is also associated with Eugene (from the Greek Eugenios, meaning ''aristocrat'').